This Is Gonna Hurt

This is gonna hurt. That is simply the reality. If you are “in ministry” you will be hurt. There will be little cuts and deep wounds. Some will stay with you and shape your ministry for good or ill, others will be soon forgotten. Some will be viscous as if from intentional wolves, others will be misunderstandings or from those who themselves have been hurt and are the proverbial bulls in china shops. 

What are some?

The attack on your preaching, and you’ll be disappointed but probably not surprised. They’ll attach your ministry and you’ll be shocked at how badly they misunderstand what you do. They’ll attack your family and you’ll be happy you don’t own a gun. 

So what do you do? Here’s five suggestions from a lecture I was asked to give recently. 

ZERO IN ON THE OFFENDER: Remember the offender: Understand the source: Perhaps they were hurt. As I was told forty years ago,Hurt people hurt people. It will lessen your pain a little if you try to see past your pain to their pain. And, it will make you a better minister. Befriend the offender. Not always, but sometimes you’ll create a lifetime friendship. 

ZONE ON JESUS: Remember: You identify with Jesus when you suffer wrongfully. When you are wallowing in your hurt read 1 Peter and rejoice. You’ll understand what I mean when you do. 

ZOOM OUT FOR PERSPECTIVE: Remember, hurt should not be our default. When the count is done you’ll have only accumulated a few folks who will ever do you a moments harm, even less who are vicious. And if you really think about it, there will be a multitude in comparison of those who love you deeply. 

ZIGZAG TO THE TRUTH: Remember there is often truth in a hurt. Challenge yourself: Is there any truth in this. If so, can I do anything about it? If there is and you can, do some self-correcting. If not, then just move forward as best you can. I’ve been called out sometimes for things I should not have done. My immediate reaction is to be angry, but on second thought I strive to learn if possible and do better if possible. 

ZAP THE CHAINS AND MOVE ON: Ultimately Remember you have to move on! The hard truth is, that you must forgive to be forgiven. Like it or not, we are simply most like Jesus when we forgive. That is why He came, that is what He has done for us when we didn’t deserve it, and that is what we must learn in striving to be like Him. As I’ve often said: The time it takes you to move forward from a slight or hurt and your effectiveness in ministry run on parallel tracks. 

Thank you for putting yourself out there and allowing yourself to be hurt. Thank you for going forward in spite of those hurts. Know that you are loved! And let us know how we can help you.