Lonely

Last week I was attending a convention out in California. There were, I’m thinking, roughly 3000 people at the convention. It is a very slickly marketed, heavily product endorsed, well scripted event. I know some of my good friends would question my going to such an event, but I go to learn methods, approaches and get tips that might be helpful for church growth. (Let me just cut to the chase on the objection: I’ve been going to conventions of a similar character for about 10-15 years, I know what I believe and hold those beliefs too strongly to be swayed by deceiving crafted presentations. Truth is truth and error is not and God expects us to be able to discern the difference). OK, now, back to the story.
I ran across Outreach because they aid churches in the design and mailing of postcards to welcome people to the community. They are good - was over first class in my estimation. In their followup emails and materials I learned about this convention. So I decided to go.
There were pros and cons to being there. There were things I liked and things I did not like. Some of those things I’ve learned to expect and just work around them.
-The times of “gathered worship” are so far away from what I believe worship is to be that I usually sneak out of those sessions until the speaker gets up and then slip back in (you handle it your way, I’ll handle it mine, OK?).
-Some of the displayers are way too much in your face! “Want a ‘free’ book?” “Yeah, thanks”, I replied grasping the latest book on whatever. “OK, then (as I noticed the Darth Vaderish clinch they had on said ‘free’ book), fill out this card (and, unstated, ‘listen to my spiel as you do’)”.
-They did a “Night of Comedy” that was as refreshing and funny as anything I’ve been to or seen in forever. It was funny, it was clean, there was not as much as an innuendo of suggestive offensive material, not a single curse word or a time when God’s name was taken in vain. And did I mention, it was funny?
But one thing of irony stood out to me. It was called National Outreach Convention, but from the time I arrived and for the next 36 hours or so, outside of those obligated (hotel clerk, shuttle bus drivers, waiter folks), NO ONE spoke to me. Now, I know it was part my fault for I didn’t push anyone to, but come on, 3,000 folks, I was 2,000 miles from home and uncomfortable, I didn’t know a soul, and no one spoke to me a time! And the more no one spoke to me the more alone, misfit, out of place and uncomfortable I became. Ironic, it was an outreach convention, and no one reached out to me.
You can be lonely in a crowd: That person who comes in to “our” building for the first time is probably uncomfortable. They need someone to connect with them. I’m a pretty gregarious person but the longer this went on the more miserable I became. I had a name tag on, I was dressed like everyone else, but people just weren’t very friendly. So, speak to someone...NO, speak to everyone. Offer a handshake, or a hug, thank them for coming, invite them to eat with you, introduce them to someone else near you, invite them to sit with you. Just be friendly!
To my Spring Meadows friends - remember, welcome as you’ve been welcomed. It’s your responsibility. A few weeks ago a friend called and told me about a visitor, a lady who is a little older who visited us by herself. My friend said: “I think I’m the only person who spoke to her.” I had two immediate thoughts: First, “thank you” for speaking with her. Because of you, she can’t say that no one spoke to me. It only takes one person. I betcha she has a good impression of the church because of your connecting with her. And two, as we grow larger, it becomes even more important that everyone of us take responsibility to welcome everyone else. They are going to feel uncomfortable and out of place, we can make that better. You’ve done great, better than anywhere I’ve ever seen! Keep it up! Remember, YOU are appointed a greeter! Now, let’s do it!
TWO QUESTIONS FOR YOUR COMMENTS:
Where have you felt “lonely in a crowd”?
What made it or could make it better? Any thoughts appreciated!