They're Made

I heard a quote in a workshop once that I have held in my pocket for many years.  “Great ________ aren’t born, they are made by the _______ next door” Fill in the blank with whatever fits (teacher, minister’s wife, etc). I’m thankful for those “next door” who have offered these words of wisdom to a minister’s wife who is still growing in her role!

1.    Remember that your first ministry is to your family. (Titus 2:4)  God has given them to you for a lifetime to love, encourage, and pour into.  Church members are also wonderful blessings, but your time with them is relatively short. Connect with and love them well but don’t forget the most important people you will minister to are the ones who live in your home.

2.    Be supportive and involved in church programs but don’t feel pressure to lead them all or even participate in them all.  I received great advice from a now dear friend when we first moved to a new congregation. She told me I I didn’t have to “do it all” nor should as that would lead to burnout quickly.  That simple permission encouraged me to be mindful of my commitments

3.    Find godly friends outside of your church family and lean on them. (Proverbs 27:9) One of God’s greatest blessings for me was the village He provided through the Christian preschool I worked for.  They were my prayer warriors and my confidants when times were tough. They allowed me to be real when I was discouraged. They were great examples of Christian wives, mothers, and sisters. They encouraged my daily walk with our Father.  They were truly worth more than rubies.  

4.    Take care of your marriage. (Proverbs 14:1) My mother gave me great advice when I first married.  She said, “Never speak ill of your husband.  The world will wear him down enough.  He needs you to build him up.” She also said, “Whatever you say, you believe.  Make sure you say good things.” Dedicate times for just the two of you whether it be lunch dates, Sonic runs, or rides in the country.  Nurture that relationship. The world needs examples of good marriages.

  • Michelle Tillman, Nashville, TN

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